Thursday, August 23, 2007

Tu Mama es LOCO!!!!

Ever see the movie, Terms of Endearment, with Shirley MacLaine and Debra Winger? There is a scene where Shirley MacLaine is trying to get the nurses to give her dying daughter (Winger) some pain medication and when they are moving too slow she goes a little psycho on them.

OK - I went "Terms of Endearment" on thay azzez.

Facility number one was driving me crazy. When I tried to call yesterday to confirm that they had all they needed from me or from our therapist or our doctor, their phones were not working for the second time in fives days!!! I don't know how you run a facility with 120 kids and not have functioning communication devices. It was maddening. And here we are 7 days since our initial contact and I still have not heard from them.

So, yesterday I called another facility and started all over again.

I cannot believe how difficult this process has been. I told my intake nemesis that she is ALREADY APPROVED and this biotch was almost yelling at that she is NOT APPROVED. I was going wiggy! I was just dumbfounded. This woman refused to make a 1-800 call that would take 5 minutes to verify. Instead she kept telling me that since DD has not been previously hospitalized, was not attempting suicide or threatening to kill us, that she did not qualify!! This is the battle I fought with the insurance company for two months and finally won. I kept asking why I had to wait until it got to that point before anyone would consider helping her.

This back and forth and her sassy attitude had me going a little psycho on the phone. I was saying things like:

"I know that this is not your typical approval and admission process. This case is a little unconventional, but if you will PLEASE just make the call. I am begging you. I'm sorry that she does not fit your little checklist but I am telling you that she is approved. Do you think I am making this up?!?! Do you think I am lying? Why would I do that? What would that get me? You would figure it out real quick and I would be stuck with a $17K bill for the month!! I am begging you to step out of the box a little and have a heart and help a mother out. This has gone on for months. I want to get her settled before school starts. I cannot believe this. I have a therapist, a psychiatrist and an insurance company all saying she needs this and it is approved--the money is in your bank as soon as you say yes--and you keep telling me that my insurance will not approve this! I am loosing my mind here. What is it going to take for you to listen to me, believe me, and take a little action beyond asking me a list of questions and dismissing me?"

She got real pissy and said, "Fine, you can come in for an assessment if you want, and when we submit the papers your insurance is going to deny coverage."

I said, "FINE! So when can we come in?"

"Tomorrow, if you want!"

"FINE! What time?"

"Can you be here at 11:00?"

"I can be there whenever you say!"

"So, then can you come in at 10:00?"

"Yes - Definitely. What do I need to bring?"

She starts going down a list of documents, thinking it would be overwhelming for me to pull all this stuff together. She really doesn't understand me. I have had her papers ready for months. Then she tells me to bring a suitcase with 5-7 changes of clothes. I said, "Wow! Tomorrow bring a suitcase? Do you really think it will happen that fast?"

And she says, "NO! I don't think it will happen at all, your insurance is not going to approve this, but as long as you are coming in you might as well."

So I asked, "Why will you not call them? What is so difficult about this? How hard would it be for you to dial them up?

She said, "I'm not going to call them because they are going to say the same thing to me that I am saying to you. She is not going to be approved!"

_ _ _ _ _ _

Maddening, I tell you.

_ _ _ _ _ _

So, I feel like she scheduled the assessment just to placate me. So I stayed up until 1:00 A.M. faxing them tons of papers. Pscyh evals. School assessments. Foster parent observations, letters from the therapist and psychiatrist both recommending RTC. Then this morning I went in with everything I have--a two-foot high stack of papers. I had everything on their checklist, which freaked them out. They said no one ever has everything; they usually have to fax something within 24 hours.

It was a long day, but eventually it all went through, and my nemesis had to come back into the room we were locked in all day and act excited when she told us, "OK- So she's been approved, as you know, and we are getting everything set up."

We then met with a doctor, two nurses, the school counselor, a cottage nurse, and got a quick tour of the place and said our goodbyes. DD was just giddy--she was so excited. Her treatments start tomorrow--as do her school classes.

The whole day was pretty surreal, and DD already called to say hi and ended with an "I love you, Momma." Which is such BS and all for show for whomever was watching her make the call. She also asked if we could write letters to each other. We must look so much more appealing to her from a distance. I am very curious to see how these 30 days go. At the end, will they recommend another 30, or will they release her? We have no idea. Insurance only approves 30 days at a time, which makes sense, but will cause a little anxiety at the end of each month.

However long they keep her, I just hope it has an impact.

3 comments:

CK Photo said...

more good thoughts for all of you. You are an amazing woman, and have the ability to move mountains.

Angie Feldman said...

Close your eyes.
Take a deep breath.
Let it out.

You are so strong - I could learn from you!

Paula said...

I want to be you. I hope I can handle the little things in life with as much tenacity as you handle such a major one. You amaze me. Sending lots and lots of hugs.