We had our first "family" therapy with DD today. Ugh! DH and I raced home to get on a conference call. The therapist let DD start with a list of things that she wanted to ask us.
The list was really her list of demands. She wants her make-up, and more clothes, different shoes, and she wants me to list more people on the phone list so she can call people.
After some silence I asked if this was family therapy or DD's shopping list for us? It really went downhill from there, but the interesting thing was that with us not being in the same room with her, she was really mouthy and back-talking like she has never done in a session before. She really exposed herself, big time. We have not met the therapist in person, but she was direct with all of us and called DD on his B.S. It got pretty heated and ended within 30 minutes. I thought it was supposed to be for an hour, but was grateful for the brevity.
Unfortunately, I had to shift gears and get back to work; so did DH. We were both completely distracted and disturbed by the exchange. SHIT!!! She still makes us miserable.
Next week we are calling in again because of the holiday and because we have my MIL visiting for the first time in 20 years. I plan to say as little as possible and let DD continue to hang herself verbally. I do not want to get blown away by this kid every week. Oh yeah - after yelling at me because I told her that I don't believe that she misses me, she said to me in a very snotty tone that she thinks going back to her mom is a good idea. She is so FRIGGIN' DELUSIONAL!!! As if that is even an option. If it was, I would strip our name off her, hand deliver her ass, then move to a new town and go underground so she and her f'd up mother couldn't ever come looking for us or money.
The therapist said she would call later this week to follow-up. There are still so many unknowns. Oh - and this therapist doesn't believe it is RAD, but teenage oppositional definace disorder, and said that RAD was a childhood disorder. Yeah! Right. Whatever. I don't care what they label her, I just don't want her back. The therapist knows there is nothing that can be done with RAD, so maybe this is her way of getting DD to qualify for a longer stay. Somewhere in the conversation today someone mentioned six weeks--which is the first I've heard of--but I don't know any details. Supposedly they are going to do a new psychological assessment on her. Should be interesting to see what new label they come up with now.
I am so sick of this. DH actually called a lawyer again today, after the session. We are really at our wits end.
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3 comments:
Hugs, I hope it is a positive for your goals that she isn't hiding behind her facade. It has to be better on the phone, I don't think I could be able to look at her anymore.
More hugs and strength for you to continue the journey of getting this over with.
It's so terrible the way this continues to completely drain you! I hope things are improving just a little bit, though it must be *so* exhausting and distracting to continually be on your toes -- trying to anticipate problems and planning for the long road ahead. You & yours are in my thoughts daily!
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