First she was staying for a month. Then they had it after one week, said they were sending her home. Then they couldn't find a flight for another week. Then a day before she was to leave, she asked if she could stay another week, and since they had a couple of good days, the grandparents said yes, asked us if it was OK, and changed her flight again. By 2:00 yesterday, they had a new flight and she had another week with them, and we had another week of peace. As soon as they changed her flight, she started acting out again, and at 11:00 PM last night, we found out they paid big bucks to fly her tail out of there at 6:00 today. Her flight arrives here in half an hour.
Then the grandparents called to de-pressurize by venting all her actions, telling me so many things that I already know and have expereinced for two years.
I had a real mixed reaction to news of her return. Part of me was bummed - I was looking forward to another week and we had plans with our son for tonight--plans that cannot happen now. Another part of me felt sadly vindicated--guilty vindication, but vindication none-the-less. I didn't say "I told you so" because they know that I gave them 20 ways out of their initial invitation to her. The benefit is that we now have a strong ally of support in getting her more intensive help. They realize that she has no clue of her impact on the world. No cause and effect. No empathy. No conscience. They realize what we have been trying to do for two years, and how futile it feels to get no where, and how it is time to let someone else who is specially trained try to help her.
We have a long way to go and a lot of hoops to jump through before we can actually get the help we (her therapist included) think she needs. Our first appointment with a Psychiatrist is June 28th. Should be interesting. Until then, we just have to muddle through and try not to get bogged down again in her tension and her drama.
It was a great two weeks.
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9 comments:
More good thoughts. I am glad your family now realizes the seriousness of her illness and the need for the right help.
I wondered how things were going. Maybe the few bright points (like when she has a couple of good days) are cause for hope? But I'm sure it can be hard to hold onto those.
Yes, many many good thoughts being sent your way.
I'm so glad that others now understand what you have gone through - Continued good thoughts headed your way.
Cynthia - don't say things like guilty vindication. Let go of the guilt. There's boatloads of stress involved and what you felt was relief that someone you are close to can now also understand. That's a good thing!
Sending along lots of good thoughts and hugs.
what parkie said :hug:
what parkie said times two..... :hugs: I can't even begin to imagine your struggle.... but continue to vent if only to relieve some of the pressure. Jeanne
I had been wondering how it had been going too. Having more people realize you struggle will make it easier since you have support. We all care a lot.
I can't add anything new or better to say, so I'll just send you lots of hugs.
I hope your meeting went well yesterday. Don't forget that lots of people care and are wishing you the best.
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